We all know there’s plenty of parenting advice out there, including on and off the golf course. This week we’re getting words of wisdom from Michael Bursin, the owner and manager of Under Par Consulting. Michael has years of D-1 golf coaching experience behind him and continues advising high school junior golfers on their next steps into college golf. As both a coach and father, he shares his thoughts on the role parents play during competitions and as we’re monitoring junior golf rankings.
Keep reading to find his advice on these critical topics!
When junior golf parents should step in
Being a parent to a high school golfer can be challenging, with all the recruitment, playing, and most importantly the support, it can be hard to decide when to step in and help. As a former college and witnessing thousands of parent/player interactions over the years, my conclusion is that generally less is more.
On course is a time for kids to concentrate, compete, and prove to themselves and coaches that they can play well. It is also a time for them to “figure it out”. Dealing with success, failure, good and bad shots is part of getting better and lots of reaction from the sidelines does not allow them to sort through those emotions on their own. If they played poorly, they know that they played poorly, they don’t need a parent to comment on it. This also can go for if they are playing well, a kid should not be looking to the cart path for confirmation from a parent.
Picking a careful communication strategy
When it comes to communication, let them be, this is their time not “ours”. Whether you are watching them or not, when they come to you, support and congratulate them, be their parents, not their coach. With a volleyball player seeking to play collegiately in my house, I start all post practice or match conversations with, did you have fun? and then move on to something else. Commenting on the results or mistakes never comes up unless she mentions it.
The same holds true for communication and who it comes from. Coaches can easily determine if social media pages, emails, and responses are created by parents or kids. As a coach, I often moved away from outreach where I could tell it was a bit too perfect to be coming from a teenager.
Paying attention to junior golf rankings
Off the course can be just as important and oftentimes this is tied to rankings. First of all we need to continue to focus on the Junior Golf Scoreboard (JGS) for our rankings. There are tour rankings, state rankings, and a few new competing websites, but at this point coaches still go to JGS.
I often get more questions from parents than players in regards to rankings and how to “navigate” them. I would caution any family to not be thinking they can “work” the rankings. Good finishes and scores are what matter most and your ranking will move accordingly. Stroke differential weighs the heaviest from JGS, while many factors out of a player’s control also move the rankings. I often encourage my players to go play and let me figure out what the rankings mean for a particular player.
A final reminder in understanding that coaches see and are aware of everyone. Rankings have never been more used in these recruiting processes and concentrating on getting better versus the rankings is the key to this being enjoyable.
As a former coach would tell his players….”Play better and good golf solves everything.“
The bottom line for junior golf parents
The words above from Michael Burcin are an excellent reminder of how crucial our role is as parents in the development of a junior golfer. Obviously, there’s a delicate balance to so many of these big topics and none of us will strike it perfectly every time. I think it’s interesting to note how much we do as parents also gets noticed by coaches during the recruitment phase too.
If you’re interested in learning more about these topics, make sure you check out this article on what college coaches are looking for.